How to not treat a girl

Few days back i came across this article on facebook; Why BEAUTIFUL WOMEN who want COMMITment will NEVER be ASKED on a REAL DATE, but a stripper will.

And i have to say i totally agree with the author, moreover it’s coming from a man’s point of view and not a woman. There’s a lot points he brought up that BOYS these days don’t do. I said boys because if u’re man enough you wouldn’t had committed any of these faults. Most of the  things he mentioned are local girls and women deal with on a daily basis, for example,

1) “Many females are gold diggers, too stuck up, so how can I approach? If you don’t have a big bank account to spoil on them, they won’t let you ask them out,”

This just boils down to sincerity. Men who thinks that girls are “gold digger”, are the ones that don’t put in enough effort to chase or get to know a girl. (and most of them are just trying to score a fuck no?). I have to admit there are girls out there who are materialistic and go for rich guys, but have guys considered that:

– the girl is naturally from a rich family, and she is used to the riches in her life
– scarred by past relationship, lost faith in man and only believe that material riches can bring her happiness

But Honestly, if u have enough sincerity and you put in the extra effort to touch her heart, the girl will look past whether u’re rich or not. Because ultimately, what a women wants is “emotional richness”. We want to marry a man who loves us, who makes us feel secure, gurantees us assurance. What’s the point of marrying a rich man if he is violent, a player, always not at home.

The other day xiang and i were talking bout how guys are willing to readily spend money at thai disco on thai working girls but they kick up a fuss when buying drinks for local girls at a club. We kindda came up with the conclusion that guys are more willing to splurge in a Siam Bu because he is guaranteed a return in terms of  an easy relationship and of course, sex and “love”. If you have to pay for sex and “love”, there’s no real love there boys. the only love in that relationship is just between the Siam Bu and your money.

*disclaimer: Siam Bu exclusively refers to girls working in Siam Tiu , not referring to all thai girls ok. Cos i know thai girls who have real jobs and honest and devoted in their relationship. Also I had seen too many cases of guys getting played by Siam Bu, but if u know Siam Bu who are not like that then, good for you and u’re one lucky fella. If not, she jus haven’t shown her rue colors*

2) ““As men, we must be chivalrous enough to ask her out on a REAL date, plan and pay for everything.”

Some men will argue on this, bringing up gender equality, like this guy

facebook

 

 

Just because a woman is independent, it doesn’t mean she don’t deserve to be treated like a princess. there’s this old chinese saying (a good one too considering chinese tradition always favour males) ” Girls are meant to be doted on”.

Every woman out there has this inner “little girl” that needs love and attention. Just because she is financially independent, doesn’t mean you cannot offer to pay for her on a date. When you do that, it shows you’re generous. Women wanna feel like we have a  special place in your heart. So when you take the effort to plan for dates, it feels like you actually took the effort and want to go out with us!  If you’re afraid that you may appear pushy by planning everything, you can give options, like you can say this,

“We could go have dinner at ______ place and then watch ____ movie. Is  that ok or would you like something else?”

it’s a lot better than “what you want do? then eat what? After that lei” (super hack care wtf!?)

i used to date this guy and I PLANNED EVERY SINGLE DATE. it made me feel like i was forcing him to go out with me because he always “anything”. It really felt like he just don’t bother at all.

3) Never tell a woman: “Let’s meet up”, “Let’s hang”, “Let’s kick it”,“Let’s chill”

Yeap, when you talk to a girl like a bro, she will treat you like a bro. So don’t complain about about being friendzoned

4) “women prefer a corny man over an arrogant asshole who is too afraid to bring her a bouquet of flowers, because he doesn’t want to be called ‘corny’ by his male friends.”

Just an example i heard from my friend the other day. His ex-girlfriend asked him why he didn’t change his relationship status on facebook to “in a relationship” and his argument was his profile pic is already a picture of 2 of them. And he refuse to change because he “just didn’t want to”

Guys, to you it may not means anything, but if your girl needs that small assurance from you, JUST GIVE IT TO HER LA! NEED SO STINGY NOT!

and then he also mentioned that his ex needed a lot attention which he cannot give. But you know why she needed that attention later part in the relationship? It’s because he didn’t “invest” in the ASSURANCE department in the first phase of the relationship. Thats why further down the relationship, the girl don’t feel secure if she is not getting enough attention.

So guys, don’t say i never say, assurance = security = happy lasting relationship where both parties understand each other

5) As men, we have to make our intentions with a woman crystal clear. From the moment we first take her out on a date; she should know whether or not it is a platonic date, or if there is any romantic interest involved. Don’t waste her time; tell a woman on the first date,

After you tell her this, respect whatever decision she makes. If she let’s you know she doesn’t want to pursue anything further with you; do not stalk a woman, blow up her phone, try to communicate with her on various social networks and make her fear for her safety. You’re just proving why she was initially correct in not giving you the opportunity to pursue anything with her.

Conversely, if she does let you know she wants to pursue something with her, do not waste valuable time you could be spending getting to know her, trying to have sex with her.

Some guys dunno where to stop. and like in this case, if a woman reject him, he blame by saying she is stuck up and arrogant. This is probably the most childish thing a man can say. If she rejects you, just graciously accept it. And if some wanna argue that you “have wasted so much time on her but only to get rejected” its because you never let your intention show in the first place what! Girl can be stupid and not read signs sometimes too. She can just take your gestures as friendly so if you like her and intend to chase her, LET HER KNOW. else u’ll regret a period in the friendzone *awwww*

 

I kind of hate it when men just conveniently brush off by saying that women don’t know what they want, women are complicated to understand. Seriously, only lazy guys say stuff like that. Women know what we want and yes we may be complicated to understand (because sometimes i’m also puzzled by how other girls act) but if you use your heart and get to know her and understand her, it’s not all that difficult.

I feel that in a relationship, it takes 2 hands to clap, if you treat the other party with respect and love, the person will reciprocate what. That why I initially intended to write on “how to not treat a guy” but if i continue this post will b too long!!! so stay tuned!!

 

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